Santa's Little Helper

Hi blog world. I missed you.

Here's a little something for Christmas. Have a great week! Especially now that New Year's just along the corner.~

I promised myself I'll be posting good quality works in my blog from now on...and this is probably the drawing to start it off.  It took much effort on my part...since I'm not really used to spending much time on personal works...but I gotta admit that it's truly, definitely fulfilling to actually FINISH something not because your boss needs it or your client or someone else. Funny thing is, it took me into varying levels of self-discovery as I worked on this piece -- mostly it involves the revelation of how lazy I truly am. Hahaha. A professional would've finished this in half a day. It took me two midnights.

That, and I really have a lot to work on with myself...both in drawing skills and...uh, let's just say I need to go under an extreme overhaul. -points to all of me both inside and out- LOL.

I've been so depressed lately. Somehow purging it all out on this drawing helps. I feel much better.

Anywho~

Yeah...more drawings to come!

PS.
You guys think it's print worthy? I'm thinking of doing a couple of more illustrations in varying themes to put up for sale.

Plus...the idea of me making small commissions: a yes or a no...or not just yet, keep practicing? Hahaha. Just saying my thoughts aloud. :)

PPS
Texture by aurorawienhold.deviantart.com
Inspired by the idea of Santa's reindeer and Jake Parker's Antler Boy character.

Year-Ender Overhaul

o·ver·haul  (vr-hôl, vr-hôl)

tr.v. o·ver·hauled, o·ver·haul·ing, o·ver·hauls

1.

a. To examine or go over carefully for needed repairs.

b. To dismantle in order to make repairs.

c. Nautical To slacken (a line) or to release and separate the blocks of (a tackle).

2. To make extensive renovations or revisions on; renovate: proposals to overhaul the health care system.

3. To catch up with; overtake.

n. (vr-hôl)

1. An act of overhauling.

2. A repair job.

 

source:  http://www.thefreedictionary.com/overhaul

Just making a few adjustments. Sucks to have a personality that's never satisfied much with anything. LOL. But yeah, I'm keeping the things I posted in the past for myself...for now. I think it's time to start anew.

It's probably just me being critical...but I feel like the past posts were obvious evidences of my aimlessness and "cluelessness" as to what to do with my yuppie life. Hahah, hopefully this time I'll be more structured...and my posts will have more direction than before. We'll see. Sorry...I really tend to be self-conscious about the stuff I do, and sometimes it's not even funny anymore. Bleh.

Let's just see... :)

For now check out some of the stuff I'm practicing on at DeviantArt!

Being tired gives you angry thoughts

what if i've finally failed more than seven times???

pano na??

i really think that seventy times seven thing has a catch.

like, for every forgiveness you asked for...you will pay the price for this setback you did last time, and pay with health problems for this thing you did the other time, etc etc etc.

you are forgiven, but the consequences will never go away.

never.

not ever. whatever they say, you will feel good, yeah, but you still have those damn scars. something like what happened to kenshin when he finally died in the end after killing all those people and he got some disease that ate his flesh away so he was forced to live in solitary confinement and have a bitter son and a sad wife.

/end rant.

just really pissed off I never get to finish anything at all. Any. Thing. Pfft. Also, I just want to do something I can call my own, but stuff just happens and decides that you should never have anything done by yourself. What happened to creative license??


Seriously.


Ugh.

Sorry.

I'll make up for this. 

TDP: 04

Below the Clouds

"The sky rarely clears up in this area, and if ever it does, you barely see the things beyond. There are things up above that aren't stars, and there are actually people who live there among the eyries."

The boy just nods, even when he finds everything the old man says as simply stories and never a fact. I mean come on, people on floating cities called 'eyries'...pfft. Really? 

 ---

Attempted a bit of matte painting...but I fail. Since I didn't even use any picture as reference material for the background. Haha.

Been researching on things related to flight and aviation...and some legendary flyers like Amelia Earhart and the Wright Brothers.  Now I'm having serious information overload and I should get some sleep.

The long holiday's over sadly. :(

TDP: 03

Quiet times

Still thinking of names and ideas. Maybe you can suggest a name for the girl? LOL

On afternoons, after spending most of her days doing flight exercises and other stuff about aviation, she likes to climb up to the highest peaks of their eyrie...sometimes just to watch the sunset paint the clouds and her floating town in majestic colors, other times to sketch out ideas for the next design for her glider, and/or probably just to catch a glimpse of the cloud sprites.

Cloud sprites are cute floating creatures with a bit of spark and fizzle in them. They are made from clouds and lightning. When touched, they do give a bit of buzz perhaps to keep you alert and from being drowsy so as not to fall from the tall peaks. I wouldn't exactly say they're living creatures...but they do seem to have moods portrayed by the colors of their center -- just like the huge clouds that they hail from. :)

---
A little back story on this piece...

I almost thought I'd never be able to post it since my PSCS6 crashed on me...but alas! Lo and behold!!!

It apparently has a new autosave feature or recovery feature that catches your image in the nick of time lest the program dies out on you. Hah! Ingenuity at its finest I must say. I doff my hat to you, Adobe. Yes, yes.

TDP: 02

The Prodigy

I think I'll just develop a story throughout the Thirty Days Project.

For the next 28 days you'll see a development in the characters, world, etc. of this story that's been on my brain for almost 2 years now. Hopefully I'll be able to define the important aspects of it soon, and to get this thing going full speed ahead.

TDP: 01

discern what is true from false. so as not to hope on things that aren't certain.

Hello.

It's been a while since I was here. Haha. Still don't know what to do, really. Since last I've been here I'm just going through the motions, putting up a face and all that just to get by.

Sometimes I wonder if the internet has made everything all too familiar that the sense of wonder and satisfaction in discovery is gone. But maybe that's just me...I mean, I'm sure if I went out to the real world, I'd end up going back to my cave to type it all in and share it about for the world wide web to see and take part in the joy I'm having.

And yet, it still makes me think that from an audience's perspective...seeing something shared on the net makes it lose the element of surprise on discovering it on your own (not to mention proving something to yourself that what you heard was actually real and ten times better in person). That, plus the excitement and the memory of it being burned into your brain until your time comes to pass.

Everything's just so easy now that everybody's easily tired.

...

I really should get out more. Heh.

July

Just decided to draw some things I'm really grateful for:
-the freedom to wear sleeveless and shorts thanks to waxing.
-my old bamboo fun that still works
-new sketchpads that cost me nothing -- thanks to brother and mother. :)
-my family
-my church sisters
-my office friends

haha. I love every single one of them. And I thank God for these awesome people he's surrounded me with.

Oh yeah...just wanted to let you guys know I'm gonna take a break from blogging for a while. Maybe a week or a month...just to gather thoughts, ideas, and whatever plans I have and such. I'll miss posting and stalking other people's posts...but yeah...we all need a little break from the interwebs once in a while. hehe!

So...yeah! See you in a while! God bless you all and thanks for the continuing support.

I think this song suits the whole mood for July...hehe!

I just want to lie in...

"Love ain't the answer, nor is work
The truth eludes me so much it hurts
But I'm still having fun and I guess that's the key
I'm a twentysomething and I'll keep being me 

...I'm a twentysomething, let me lie in
Leave me alone, I'm a twentysomething"

Inspired by Jamie Cullum's song "Twentysomething". If you've been around for over a year, you'll notice I've already raved about the song LOL. I really relate to that song and it's one of my many favorite songs. Hehe.

In other news...the Thirty Days Project: Travel Light is officially over in the site itself! I didn't make it, thanks to unexpected plans and work in general. But like what the blog thingsweforget says: 'small things done are better than great things planned.' Haha. I was planning to make a comic...but I guess that's a big plan for a daily project...next time I'll reconsider my options. But don't worry...I'm still gonna do the comic just for completion's sake.

And since my project is about moving on...especially over a specific someone before June 30...well let me tell you that I've successfully done it! A year of self-imposed misery is finally over...and I can now think with a much clearer mind. :) Be prepared for more posts..because I've come out of this adventure more driven and inspired than I've ever felt. Hah!

gratefulness is a very wonderful asset...way better than anything a woman can ever posses aside from gentleness, grace and serenity. lol.

understanding how celebrities feel

One sunny Sunday lunchdate with my church friends at KFC...some nursing student dude went up to our table and asked me if he could take a picture with me. It took me off guard and all I can do was say yes. I don't know what happened or why would a guy even want to have a picture taken with me in it...but it's the most flattering, self-confidence boosting thing that has ever happened to my life. Now I know what celebrities feel like. Hahaha. It must be the hair.

Nah, actually it was God's doing. I was ranting to Him the other night about how I just want to know if I'm worth something at all in the attraction/romance aspect of things. In short, I just want to be appreciated by a guy....since that rarely ever happens without me trying. I was never really confident with how I see or carry myself so...yeah...but God just knows what to do to let you know how special you are. :)

In other news! Here's another attempt at comics...this time it's a bit more personal since it's about my views on baptism and such...it's just a rough work of sorts...so maybe you won't get it.

Mark 1:9-13

I drew it on my planner...so it's a bit messed up. LOL. Anyway...yeah that's all for now! :)

open secrets

i dream of you in colors that don't exist...- olivia steele

mmm....will be using this as inspiration for a story..... :)

We Don't Have it All

Inspired by Mr. Boulet's website. I got it from Mr. Keith Ikeda-Barry who's also a participant in the 30 Days Project!

This is really not much...but I guess I could entertain you with a little rant I have about this whole 'moving on' project I decided to sign up for:

Sometimes I feel that it's such a heavy task that it seems impossible to attain. I remember my first heartbreak...and it took me two years, and one god-awful-online-relationship-that-lasted-three-months-which-just-made-things-worse just to move on and learn my lesson. It felt like forever.

And once again...it feels like forever. With an additional nagging feeling that I'm making another impending mistake in the horizon...(that I never wish will happen....I really don't.)

If indeed there are reincarnations...I'd love to be reincarnated to an inanimate object. Perhaps they don't have feelings...and their sole responsibility is to be a rock that's meant to cut off someone's arm a' la 127 hours style. Right now, emotions are a big deal of pain in my life. Even the littlest of pleasures eventually depress me. I don't know why...or maybe I do know why. It's probably my fear of loss, or my sense of denial over feelings of grief....who knows right? Probably both.

It's funny that I'm heartbroken because I realize that it's pointless to chase after the wind, not because someone deliberately broke my heart. In a sense, I broke my own heart for letting myself "like/love" someone to a pointless, foreveralone-esque degree.

Anyway...yeah. I just want to be the wind. Floating around, making people smile or pissed with the gusts I make and not being aware of it because I'm comprised of atoms that buzz around to make air.

...who or what moves those atoms in such a way that it can take off roofs or entire houses on a strong monsoon season? Is the atomic/molecular activity so strong that it just deliberately forms itself into a raging storm? God knows.

Too bad, because like the mysterious activity of the wind currents...God won't explain to me why I feel this way and not some other way instead. Oh the struggles of practicing one's faith and being human and sane.

bakuna (vaccine)

akala ko panaginip
pakiramdam ko'y umakyat ako sa langit
yun pala'y dahil sa lalim ng tulog ko...
ay binuhat nyo nako papunta dun sa kwarto

nagising ako nun,
pero nagtulug-tulugan ako
kasi natuwa ako
na nakapulupot sa bisig nyo

matapos nun natulog na ulit ako
nalimutan ang lahat ng sakit
galing dun sa bakuna
na pinilit ko nalang itulog
habang nakadapa ako

For father's day...:)

the art of getting by

sometimes it's just letting go of all inhibitions. haha. :)

it's based on this song:

You Already Know - Bombay Bicycle Club
the moment we forgot we were just good friends
i moved my arm her face went red again
one more bus home
another silent weekend

said love was painted gold
like all things growing old
the paint peels and slowly falls
you already know (3 x)

looking out the glass
always sit together
we both know we could be someone better
not with our heads like London weather

said love was painted gold
like all things growing old
the paint peels and slowly fallsyou already know (4 x)

Slipping Through the Cracks

Words are not enough
Sometimes silence makes it clear
.....Yet my heart is ill
---14
i long to say it
but i fear i never will
it's just that i love.....
---15

no drawings for now...sorry guys.

indie day

Trying to keep up with the pace of things. Yesterday was our Independence Day Holiday. A pretty special event for me personally...but I'll delve into the details another time, though this picture says a little bit of what it is. Hehe. I hope I still manage to keep up with the pace of the 30daysproject....I'm getting a bit behind! Eep.

UPDATE:

here's the day 10 and 11 drawings

sometimes...letting go makes you feel tired...and alone. it's the fear i guess.

monochromicorn

it's dark and i can't see...but i know it's you who i'll follow...

 Let black be black

And white be white

Clarity as bright as day

Let it be, come what may...

Cover me in the shadow of your light.

Ever guiding me, ever saving me

From the snares of the enemy

Til the dawn of eternity...

---

All I can say for today is that....only a few people like noir films. Because a lot of us prefer a whole range of gray areas that fit our selfish standards. Black and white is so passe. Gradient is the trend. After all it does set the mood...keeps everything....'balanced'.

Eventually colorblindness will be an asset and people with 20/20 visions are cursed. The people who bask in the light are morons...and darkness is considered heaven.

We're in for a ride my friends. Buckle up.

Listen Easy

At the end of the day
Your Light matters more
Than anything I want or desire

The "love" I wish for pales in comparison
Even in just the slightest hint o' whisper
And that quiets me more than anything

At the end of the day
This is all I need
More than anything I want or desire.



Not much to say today...the song says it all. Goodnight everyone :)

Another Double Feature...heh

Day 06

This is for June 6. Also an illustration/interpretation I made for a poem my friend wrote. It's about time too since she wrote it for almost two months now! So sorry, Patring! Haha. :)

Here's the origin of inspiration for this:

Calle Crisologo (15 Apr 2012)
By Pat San Jose
Sa isang lumang kalye
Matapos ng taimtim na pag-usal
Sa isang birong pagsamo
Papitik-pitik na kinulayan
Ng kadiliman ang
Iyong kadiliman.

Pasuray suray na paglakad
Sa patutunguhang serbesa ang nagdikta
Pagyapos sa malamig at lumang kalyeng
Ginahasa ng mga karwahe
Ng pagkakataon, ng pag-asa,
Ng mga sirang pangarap na ‘di malasing
ng isang tagay pa.

At nais ko mang hawakan ang iyong kamay
Ako’y pitik ng liwanag na nangangailangan
rin ng gabay
Sa payak nating sabay na pagsuray
Sa isang lumang kalye
Bumulong sa akin ang gabi –
Ng pagkakataon, ng pag-asa –
Ngunit naging masyadong mabilis ang
pagdating ng umaga.

 She owns a blog...please do visit her wonderful thoughts here:  http://pagsablay.wordpress.com/

Here's for June 7:

Day 07

Is inspired by another favorite musician of mine: Newton Faulkner! Hooohah!
Just for the lulz

A Sequel...

Consider this as day 04 and 05 since I kinda finished it around the wee hours of the morning. The first half was done at June 4 and the other was finished at June 5. Haha!

It's actually a continuation of this post. Just to reveal that moving on is not simply leaving something behind, but more importantly that it's about moving forward to something or in my case, Someone.

It's stressed perfectly by this song written by one of my teenage heroes -- Barbie Almalbis!

http://youtu.be/hVLJ2s_KDvU -- PLEASE VISIT AND WATCH THE SONG. AAAH!

Goodbye My Shadow - Barbie Almalbis
Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye
The door is now closed
From the fears and the lies

Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye
The door is now closed
From the fears and the lies

There is
A ladder to climb
But I can’t carry you
Coz it’s one at a time

Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye
There are no regrets
When it’s love who decides

I’m leaving you
I’m leaving you tonight
I’m going to
I’m going to the light

Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye my shadow
Goodbye my shadow
Hoo

I’m leaving you
I’m leaving you tonight
I’m going to
I’m going to the light

I’m leaving you
I’m leaving you tonight
I’m going to
I’m going to the light

Blue Skies

sooooo instagramish. haha. this is for day 3...based on a song that is also listed on my Mixtape Project! So this is kinda like hitting two birds with one stone LOLS. For my friend, Faye who loves Noah and the Whale...and for all of us out there moving on, there's always blue skies coming even if it's hard :)

and a blast from the past drawing:

This used to be you...
One sleepless night
When all my thoughts were about you
Wishing that you were holding me and all

Sometimes I wish it still,
But not to the point of making me ill
From sleeplessness and senseless wishing.
Nope. Not anymore indeed. Instead...

I'd like to think that he's someone
Who's deserving to hold me
Until we both fall asleep
Content, because our wishes have been fulfilled.

MP: Nothing.

....I fail as a person artist being.

Well no. I'm not saying I'm not doing any...but things are really going slow...but please just hang on. I am working on them. Why am I even stressing myself no? Love has taken its toll on me it seems.

But yeah. I'll be posting some decent updates next week...just hang in there.

Usapang Maganda 2012 Moments

Just some of the things you'll witness if ever you're with the WIPster gang. :)

i miss highschool sometimes.

This bottle is bringing me down
No comfort for me in this town
All the faith in these eyes
Lost the glow and just dies
I pray, redeem this heart
And be here now.

In this war
The tears in my eyes says it all
Put all of my faith in you now
When all of the world says
We wont make it through
We'll battle the world.

I feel so alone
The situation's desperate
Until I've found my life again I drown
So save me now
Breathe new life in me
 

In this war
The tears in my eyes says it all
Put all of my faith in you now
When all of the world says
We wont make it through
We'll battle the world.

I greet the morning sky
The sun dries tears in my eyes
Awaken this sleeping heart of mine
And be here now

In this war
The tears in my eyes says it all
Put all of my faith in you now
When all of the world says
We wont make it through
We'll battle the world.

Awaken this sleeping heart of mine
Awaken this heart.
Awaken this sleeping heart of mine

--
it's that amazing moment where you used to have another meaning for the song and now you understand the song more completely...and means a whole lot more to you than before.

Love Barf

Tonight, poetry precedes the first drawing of the MP. Forgive my failure at literary things.

It's 430 in the morning,
and my thoughts are still back in time.
When your hand was on my shoulder,
and your eyes was on my every move.

When I had your full attention for a complete 1 hour or so.
Just to make sure if I'll be alright as we go home.

I don't know, and I'll never be sure as of now...
if you feel the same way I do about these little things
But one thing I do know...is that last night means a lot to me.

Call it mush, call it cheese
Heck call this the lamest repetitive thing ever
I don't care.
Because if you've been in my place --
Where you suddenly feel important enough to be made sure safe
until we reach the part where we have to part ways...

Then I really don't give a damn about anybody's opinions.
Even yours if you ever get to read this someday.
I so badly want to spoil everything by spilling my heart out to you.
But I've come to like the awkward friendship we're trying to go into...(it IS cute in a way)

Besides maybe someday...you'll come around and say
The words I hope to hear so that you'd know I feel the same way. :)

MP: Cover

AKA a sad, lame, excuse of a drawing for a four day delay on things...

lineart by yours truly. colors by eveth :)

 But I think it's totally worth it for a make-up drawing...especially when Eveth colored it. LOL. It's supposed to be my interpretation of Day 1's song...but I found it too straightforward and lame for some reason...so I just decided it'd be the "cover" for the entire project thing.

Anyway, yeah I can't post every drawing on each day itself...and I'm four days behind...but I guarantee you that before February ends, you'll see the results of the songs you sent in. Unless you support me and love me enough by donating a scanner/wacom tablet so that I can work on it at home. HAHA. :p

Love you guys, sorry! Just a lot of things happening at work...they're making us learn 3D animation -- which I'm honestly worried about since I'll have to wake up at 5 in the morning just to get to the office on time for the 9-11am workshop. Bleargh...things you do for growth. hahaha...oh well :)

January Doodles

I'm supposed to be working on the Mixtape Project by now...but office time is killing me. I'm sorry. Either way I can't post them on the day itself since I don't have a scanner and I plan to work on them traditionally...so...same difference.

In other news, I still manage to doodle a few things at work! So have a look-see. :)

first day at work haha :) 01232012

view from our office window 3rd day. 01252012

wipsters 01262012

a different take on the look-book doodle thing. :D 01272012

Yeahp, that's all for now. Too bad I can't post some of the stuff I'm doing for work...oh well! About the Mixtape Drawings, maybe when I manage to scan them I'll show them to you how it's going..but I do promise that I am working on them as soon as I can manage @_@ haha! :) Toodles!

Mixtape Project

Hi Friendlies!

Just wanted to announce something special I came up with yesterday.

The Mixtape Project.
It's a kind of themed daily drawing project where I asked people to suggest their favorite (or whatever comes to mind first) love songs, then I'll draw/illustrate my own interpretation of the song they suggested. So for the entire month of February, I'll be busy on my spare time with this playlist created by my friends!

1. Something Stupid - Robbie Williams and Nicole Kidman (Jekko)
2. You and Me - Lifehouse (Dionne)
3.Sunburn - Owl City (Rini)
4.So Close - Jon Mclaughin (Bea)
5.Time After Time - Cindy Lauper (Auds)
6.Ever The Same - Rob Thomas (Eveth)
7.Best I Ever Had - Vertical Horizon (Joseph)
8.Simple, Starving to be Safe - Daphne Loves Derby (Mitz)
9.Close to You - Carpenters (Jonski)
10. Build Me Up Buttercup - The Foundations (Nicole)
11.I don't want to set the world on fire - Ink Spots (Arianne)
12.Stick Around - Azure (Gon)
13.kahit anong kanta ni april boy (mark)
14. You've Got me Wrapped Around Your Little Finger - Beth Rowley (Anna)
15. Can't Help Falling In Love - Elvis (Dom)
16. Hiling - Silent Sanctuary (Just)
17.Sen No Yoru Wo Koete - Bleach OST (Jewel)
18. Never Lose Your Heart - Noel Pointer (Sir Rags)
19. Pag-Ibig Ko'y Metal - Jograd dela Torre (Irish)
20. More than Words - Guru Pitka (Robin)
21. Terrified - Zach Levi & Kath McPhee (Makel)
22. Vanilla Twilight - Owl City (Xtian)
23. By Chance (You and I) - JRA (Jommel)
24. I'm Yours - Jason Mraz (Miah)
25. If You Ever Come Back - The Script (Kaye)
26. Blue Skies - Noah and the Whale (Faye)
27. Sana - Shamrock (Jeffrey)
28. Tonight I Give In - Angela Boliff  (CJ)
29. I See the Light - Mandy Moore & Zach Levi (Gerik)

For those who'll probably keep on suggesting even if it's too late, no worries...I'll still draw them if I have spare time but on a more smaller scale. I can't wait to work on these songs that came in...it gave me a reason to look forward to the month of love! LOLZ.

Also you can still change your mind up until the day before your list number...so yeah! Oh well...hopefully I can finish every single love song.

**Little Mixtapes (The ones that didn't make it to the list)
_Your Arms Around Me - Jens Lekman (Kelly)
_One Night - The Corrs (Becks)
_Stigmatized - The Calling (Cayel)
_Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Frank Valli (Karla)
_I Just Haven't Met You Yet - Michael Buble (Ness)
_By My Side - David Choi (Rom)
_Til They Take My Heart Away - Claire Marlow (Mom)*
_I Love You More Today Than Yesterday - Goldfinger (Jem)*
_Don't Know What to Say - Ric Segreto (Noel)
_When I Fall In Love - Nat King Cole (Auntie)
_You First Believed - Hoku (Ate Mhelle)

*finished

because love is so hardcore...